7
Ways To Say No To Your Boss And Keep Your Job
"If
you aren’t willing to change your opinion, don’t expect your boss to change
hers."
Nobody
wants to be a yes-man (or woman), but that doesn’t make it any easier to say no
to your boss. Whether you’re being asked to increase your workload, take on a
task that you believe is a bad idea, or work the weekend, how do you tactfully
decline?
"People
have a hard time saying 'no'––period––and when you introduce power, it gets
exponentially worse," says Joseph
Grenny,
coauthor of Crucial Conversations.
Yet,
good bosses appreciate employees who have the confidence to say no, says
workplace communications consultant Diane Amundson. "Most say they’re
willing to listen to sound reasoning to find a solution," she says.
"It’s all about how you frame and phrase it."
Instead
of declining the request and walking away, Grenny and Amundson offer seven
tips for delivering an effective, non-polarizing "no":
1. Avoid a Power Struggle
Begin
by acknowledging that the decision is ultimately your boss’s, says Grenny.
"Clarify that by saying, ‘I have strong opinions on what is the right
answer but I understand this is your call,’" he says. "Otherwise the
subject can become a power struggle."
It’s
not who is right, it’s what is right.
Amundson
says sometimes a "no" is a battle not a war, and you need to know the
difference. "Ask yourself what the worst outcome may be from saying ‘no’
and write this down," she suggests. "Decide which appears to have the
biggest impact on your current workload and future with the company."
2. Acknowledge That You Ultimately Have The
Same Goals.
Members
of the military say to salute the flag before you disagree with a senior
officer, says Grenny. The same is true in business. Keep in mind that your
ultimate goal is the same: to further the company.
"Your
mutual higher purpose is to serve, and your job is to accomplish goals,"
he says. "It’s not who is right, it’s what is right."
3. Empathize
People
are more open to having someone disagree with them if they feel deeply
understood, says Grenny.
"Listen
to your boss’s arguments and concerns before voicing your own," he says.
"She will feel much less defensive if she felt heard. If you aren’t
willing to change your opinion, don’t expect your boss to change hers."
If
you aren’t willing to change your opinion, don’t expect your boss to change
hers.
Amundson
agrees: "You can say, ‘I understand your perspective, and here’s another
way to think about the situation,’" she says. "If you have sound
reasoning and honored their idea, your boss will be more open to
listening."
4. Explain The Consequences Of The Request
People
often believe if their boss trusted them, they’d be willing to take a chance
and follow their suggestion, but you shouldn’t make a disagreement personal
when it doesn’t need to be, says Grenny.
Instead,
draw power from the facts. After you’ve acknowledged the importance of the
request, share how the new task might impact other projects. For example, it
might take away needed resources or burden your workload. Then ask for a
solution.
"Is
there something your boss could take off your plate to allow you the time to
take on this project?" asks Amundson.
Too
often we get into a debate about conclusions, says Grenny. "If you want to
say ‘no,’ and your boss wants you to say ‘yes,’ each of you has information
that differs," he says. Start by exposing where your facts are thin.
"Acknowledge
what you know to be true and tell your boss how it caused your
conclusion," he says. "Ask how your boss came to her conclusion. If
you’re simply in a no-yes argument, you’re arguing conclusions not facts."
When
the requests are about your time, Amundson says it’s helpful to establish rules
early on.
"If
you don’t want to be on call during weekends or holidays, make this clear in
the beginning where there is more leeway and where it’s black and white,"
she says. Then saying "no" won’t come as a surprise.
What
has happened in the office right before this request? Amundson says it might
impact your ability to say 2no."
"If
you have just received a poor work evaluation or have said ‘no’ recently to
your boss, perhaps it’s not the best time to buck the system," she says.
"If your past performance has been praised and valued, you have more
leeway."
By Stephanie
Vozza
http://www.fastcompany.com/3044750/hit-the-ground-running/7-ways-to-say-no-to-your-boss-and-keep-your-job
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