ON-THE-JOB SPECIAL....When friends become colleagues

When friends become colleagues

She is your best friend. You have been through boyfriend trouble, through teenage angst, and spent many a night eating fatty food and whining about life. Then you both get your dream jobs, in the same organisation. Suddenly, you have to navigate that tricky line between being colleagues and being friends and not let professional jealousy raise its ugly head.  Here are a few tips on how to deal with having your closest friend become your professional rival. Join separate teams:   If you’re working in an organisation that allows for separate teams with separate deadlines and different bosses, take advantage of it. Ignore people who say that being friends in the same team means a better working rapport because you understand each other. It is good advice, but it will come back to bite you, especially during team meetings where your work will be praised and hers will be trashed to bits. Being in different teams also gives you that many extra people to bitch about post work. Focus on strengths:   If you are good friends you will know each others’ strengths. Play to your strengths. If you know she can do something better than you, give that job to her and vice versa. Stay neutral:   If there is friction between your friend and others in the team, and you are called upon to take sides, do a little fence sitting. Once outside the office, explain why you said what you did using the ‘I’m doing this for the team’ excuse.  Ignorance is bliss:  If you know your friend is feeling jealous, try talking it out with her. If this doesn’t work, it’s best to leave her alone and focus on your work. You’re damned either way, so why not make the best of it. You will be surprised at how anger and indifference can sometimes produce brilliant work. She will come around. Separate your professional and personal life:   The more you keep your personal relationship out of office space, the better it is. The worst thing to do is to continue a fight from home at work. Then, attentions shifts from your work to your personal life. It’s wiser to leave your personal grudges behind before you enter office each day. Have a different friends circle:   This is for those occasions when you cannot help but carry your work around with you. And if it involves your friend, you wouldn’t want her being a part of such a conversation. Talking to a neutral third party will help you unwind, and give you a different perspective on how to handle things. Accept that you are good:  A little self praise never hurt anyone. If you get a big promotion and your friend doesn’t, console her, but don’t feel guilty. You have worked hard for it and earned the promotion; guilt will just ruin it. You and your friend are different, and your career doesn’t really depend on hers and vice versa (unless she is your boss, that calls for another column). Be proud of what you’ve achieved but don’t overdo the celebrations.

Joanna Lobo DNA120909